Live poker and the most rigged fruit machine ever

Met up with a few old school friends last night in Liverpool Street. We headed to the Corney and Barrow for a few drinks, then a nice steak at Marco Pierre White Steakhouse and Grill. After some red wine and a few cheeky cocktails, we then decided it would be a good idea to head to the Empire, Leicester Square, for some casino action.

It didn’t start well, given the dodgy minicab we took seemed intent on having an accident on the way there. It was pissing down, and the car was totally misted up, yet he opted to just floor it, and refuse to put on his de-mister for the screen. Not a pleasant experience I can tell you.So we arrive at about 11pm, its pretty busy, and I decide to leave the boys on the roulette table (which I don’t play) and go see what poker games were spread. Alas, only 3 games of £1/£2 were playing, so I took the last spare seat and bought in for £300.

Now I hate live poker I must tell you. Its just so tediously slow, and unless you’re playing for meaningful stakes, its hard to get excited about it. That said, the players are always soo bad, it is pretty amusing. This time I lasted 3 orbits (27 hands), that said, the 27 hands were pretty profitable as I left the table £305 up which took about 25mins. gg me.

Only 2 interesting hands, in fact, I think I only played 2 hands in total lol.

Hand 1: 6 players limp to me (lol) in the BB, I look down at ATo, consider making an isolation bet, but decide not to as it’s the very first hand of the night, and I’d probably get 6 callers obv. Flop comes AQ5r, its checked through. Turn was a T bringing a spade draw too. Im pretty sure I have the best hand at this point, so I decided to build a pot. I bet £10 into £12 and get 4 callers. Lol live poker makes me laugh. River was a T, nice. Now these people have all called with something, I decided to check thinking 1) anyone with a Ten in their hand is betting which will set up a nice c/r, 2) all the draws missed, so no one is calling a bet, but they might bluff at it, and 3) I was also praying someone slowplayed KJ, or a set, which again I can c/r against. So obv it checked around (sigh), and I pick up about a £50 pot. Im still torn as to whether I should just bet out there on the river, these players were probably bad enough to call me down with Ax there, so maybe I missed some value…

Hand 2: Pretty standard. 5 limpers (lol), button raises to £20, and l look down at KK in the SB, I re-pop it to £50, folds around, and btn says ‘I’ll give you a spin’ and calls. At this point im putting him on AK, maybe AQ/KQss, TT, JJ, or QQ. He actually seemed somewhat competent in the few hands id seen. Flop comes a dream 852, I cbet £80 into £110 (probably too much actually, I think I prefer £70 there), villain dwells for a while, and then shoves his remaining £210 or so. I insta-call and scoop vs his QQ. Just a cold deck for the guy there. He said he was close to folding on the flop, im not sure if he was serious. But folding there Btn vs SB in that spot is just terribad in my opinion. So yeah, he played it fine, and was just a crap spot for him.

After that I decide to get up and see how the boys are doing on the roulette tables. I find them as a mate of mine is putting £700 on black. Lol. Obv roulette is rigged and it didn’t come in. A few more hefty bets later and between us we were up £800. Brilliant. Well, I say brilliant, until you realise on our way out, the other two dumped £1000 into a fruit machine (rigged also obv). Hahaha. Funny funny night.